After reading my gardening blog, Taras Borzakov, a rather angry man from Mother Russia sent me a message, so i have decided to put it here, and edit it thru for your reading pleasure;
Dobry den, Kak vashi dela? (-edit- he means "good day, how are you?")
you crazy english dogs, you know nothing of gardening.
in mother russia, we have many chemical wars, and plants mutate many times.
to kill weed, you have to fight it. with bare hands. and knife. Bah. we no use for weedkiller, that is for wimpy man.
i once find weed so big, it ate my mother's goat. i strangled it into submission, punched in its freaky flant face an then it spit goat out.
i come to this country you call england, to show you how real man has garden. all i see is little mole man on tv, and red-haired woman with droopy breasts making water features. Pah. to make plant grow big, give plant uranium. it make big and strong. to get rid of unwanted plants, weeds, or those silly flowers, use Trinitrotoluene. they not ever come back. that is all pig-dogs.
ya ochen lyublyu tebya i prashu stat mayey zshenoy
(-edit- this means "I love you very much and ask you to be my wife")